April 2002

April 2002 Newsletter

UNHEALTHY ROLES FOR YOUR KIDS

Sometimes after a separation or divorce, children are cast or cast themselves in roles that children should not have to play.

1. Messenger. Don't involve children in communication between parents. Don't ask children to courier notes, information or items between parents.

2. Judge. Respect your child's right to love and admire each parent, and to develop their own opinions within the parent-child relationship.

3. Reporter. Ask the child about the child's own activities that happened during their visit to the other parent, but don't ask about the activities of a former spouse or of his or her new love interest.

4. Confidant. Don't make the child your best friend or ask the child to play therapist when you are upset or angry. Set boundaries for the child who seeks to help you too much with your personal, adult problems.

In short, allow your kids to be kids and to love both parents.

WHAT DOES IT MEAN TO BE A "BOARD CERTIFIED" FAMILY LAWYER?

You may see the term "board certified" listed in the yellow pages or on line legal directories for some lawyers who specialize in family law. But what does that mean?

The certification comes from the Texas Board of Legal Specialization. The Board's rules and requirements are approved by the Supreme Court of Texas. The relevant requirements are as follows:

• State Bar of Texas Membership
• Offices in Texas
• 5 years of full-time practice of law
• Evidence of good character and reputation
• 5 References as to competence in family law
• 60 hours of Continuing Legal Education in family law over 3 years prior to application
• Must have devoted a minimum of 35% of their time practicing family law over three years prior to application
• 9 final trials of Texas family law cases
• 30 contested Texas family law matters handled
• Jury trial, appeal or mediation experience in family law cases
• Pass a written examination

Board certification is a commendable achievement, and it shows an attorney's dedication to the practice of family law as a specialty. Usually a board certified attorney handles complex cases, and is able to command high dollar fees. The 2001 Tarrant County Family Law Bar Association Membership Directory lists 55 of its members as being board certified out of about 300 members. Yours truly is not board certified, but I am considering applying for it in a few years.

SINGLE PARENTING

Recently, as I prepared to lead a class on Single Parenting at the Parenting Center in Fort Worth, I looked at a few websites tailored to single parents. I liked the sites www.makinglemonade.com, and www.singleparentcentral.com. Check them out for information and support.

Prior Newsletters

• February 2002
• October 2002
• September 2002
• July 2002
• January 2002
• October 2001
• September 2001
• August 2001