Deployment, transfers, and long stretches away from loved ones are part and parcel of military service. Families usually follow the service member to their new posting, dutifully if not enthusiastically. But what happens when the family is made up of two same-sex partners? Bringing a same-sex partner to a new posting overseas is sometimes impossible because of local laws. One columnist says the military is using those laws and the Defense of Marriage Act to deliberately split up gay couples.